Time Travel or How I Bought A New Watch and Had to Return the Junk

Recently, as stated before, I had a couple job interviews. While on my travels I had some free time between interviews and decided to stop off at a big outlet mall. It had been some time since going to one of these or any type of shopping place. It was a day out for me!

I was just window shopping when I came across a nice little watch store. I thought “Ooo. I need a watch!” I did, too, to replace the one stolen from me a couple years ago. Anyways. I went in and looked around. I asked the woman at the counter specifically for a manual or wind-up watch. She looked around said: “Oh, you mean automatic?”

I stopped, thought for a second or two (I don’t know for how long I thought as I had not a watch). In my head I said “did I fucking stutter?” but in reality I responded: “Well, I could live with that, but it was not Time Travelactually what I was looking for…” and the conversation went on with basic questions and watch fittings. So, eventually she picked one watch out which was an automatic, but it was too expensive for my tastes. She then found one to compare which was ultra cheap on sale. I bought the cheap one because even though I had some extra cash this week, I am a cheap “mofo.” I bought it, left, and started looking around at the other shops.

After a while I thought I would sit down and look at the watch. After careful examination of the watch, I realized it was not an “automatic” watch. In fact, it was just a cheap piece of shit battery operated one. So, I promptly marched back to the shop from where I bought it. I kindly explained to the woman my concerns and returned it for one which was identical to the one which was stolen from me a couple of years ago.

Fast Forward to the next morning, time travel if you must (he did not just say that, laughs ahoy), and I check the time on my awesome-new-watch-which-looks- like- my-old-expensive-watch. At 8 a.m. this morning it said it was 6 p.m. yesterday. I checked it all over. The hands are moving and all seemed to be in order. The fucking shit watch did not keep time. I was so pissed.

I immediately called and complained. The woman at the store told me I had two options. Option 1: I could return the watch to the store. This would be fine if I lived locally, but at the time I was in the middle of my interview travels. I was at a motel 3 hours away. Option 2: I could mail the watch back to the factory for repairs. I looked up information about mailing the watch for repairs and the warranty information. Apparently I would need to pay for the shipping both ways. I was very angry.

I looked at all my options. Another option which I could do myself was to try a new battery. Maybe it was just the battery. This was a plausible option, but I was upset that a new watch would require me to pay more money for a new battery. My decision: Spend a couple hours to travel back to the mall and shove the watch down some little bitch face throat so she can either shit me out a new watch or turn that into cash.

Well, unfortunately, it did not end with a big, dramatic ending. I did not have the energy after all the driving. I drove back to the mall and politely told her the watch was a piece of shit. She returned my money. I drove away. Moral of the story: Fuck watch companies which remind one of hard remains which can be dug up from the ground.

Travel is fun. Time travel is expensive. I found another watch to purchase, and someday I will write about it I am sure. Too bad it does not have a flux capacitor. Thank you for your time.


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